Monday, July 18, 2011

The Next Step.

As i sit here, editing the third draft of Silence & Noise i stop to think about the journey.  the things that got me to this place and the unknown that will follow.  the closer i get to the end of the draft the more excited i find myself getting.   the idea that all the hours and months poured into this story, all the years in my own life that have come alive thru Lily's story, all of it will soon be finished.  i can't wait for other people to read it, people who have been so important in my life and people i don't even know.  i can't help but think there might be something in Lily's story for everyone.  a piece we can cling on to and hold tight to.  there are so many moments as i write, i want to wrap my arms around Lily, comfort her and tell her there is a better place than where she is.  then i remind myself she is strong, and determined and no matter what she will survive herself.  i think everyone has that fight in them, i think sometimes we just forget it when things get hard.  we forget about our tenacity, our fire, our spirit.  even in our timidness, in our fear, we all have strength within us.  i'm thankful i will forever have Lily's story to remind me of that.

this post was inspired by this excerpt from Silence & Noise: one girl's journey into insanity 
"I found peace in my misery.  Some twisted peace.  The kind that doesn’t really exist."  

Monday, July 11, 2011


I just finished editing a chapter in the novel about a goodbye.  It made me reflect on the goodbyes in my life.  The moments that i re-live in my mind.  The moments i have almost forgotten about.  Goodbyes can vary so much in emotion, from bitter-sweet, to complete sadness, and everything else in between.  There are the goodbye for now's and the final goodbye's.  And sometimes i know for myself, i don't even realize at the time when i am in those moments of finality.  Maybe it's not wanting to admit it to yourself at the time.  Not wanting to see the end of an era, the end of a relationship.  What is a goodbye that sticks out in your memory?  Do you wish you could go back in time and experience it again?